Been steamed, reamed & dry cleaned?

been lied to? Robbed? Misled? This is the place to fight back & learn your rights or get the best comprehensive service for about $1.90 a day!


If you've been steamed, reamed and dry cleaned or shafted, gafted and wazoo-blasted, then this is how filing a complaint works for you and against the scum bag sleaze-o that took you for a ride.

Before we begin, and my funny way of saying things aside, this section will try to explain just how complaints are filed and which organization handles which particular complaint. We're chartered in Florida so, for the sake of this discussion we'll use Florida as an example. Also, I'll do my best to walk you through the steps but for best accuracy one should look into the matter themselves. These options are available to all consumers in the continental U.S. and its territories, they are free and quite easy to accomplish. Our charming competitors are always forgetting to inform the general public of these resources (so our clients tell us) so without further ado, let's begin.

The CFPB handles a variety of complaints and can be the best choice if...

You've been cheated by a bank, have a collection agency reporting wrong information and refusing to provide documented proof or even something as simple as having a rental deposit check un-returned. These guys take your complaint and issue you a claim number. Then they reach out and touch someone. Usually, a company will snap to compliance when these guys are involved, and it's always a good idea to have some documentation to back up your claim. The online platform is as easy to navigate as say, buying four cases of water and a carton of mayonnaise jars from Amazon. The integration is down to a science and the page allows you to make a solution request. They don't force anyone to do anything and offer no legal services, but it's a good mediator. 

The FTC is another option if the problem is a bigger one such as...

A company blatantly robbed you under a morass of false promises and claims (i.e., conned you). If you've been overcharged or believe you have been victimized in some manner by a company who has charged you and not provided service as agreed (doesn't have to be a Credit Counseling firm), then these are the guys you'd want to file with. Their website is chock full of stuff, but surprisingly simple to navigate and file complaints. Like the CFPB, they also issue a claim report number, and like them they also reach right out and try to find a solution to the problem.

They provide direct oversight to all Credit Repair and Credit/Debt Consultants anywhere in the U.S. and its territories. The FTC is not a joke, and its resources are available free to all consumers and companies.

Pay attention to the "and" part...

Ever been standing at a gas pump at 3 am in your underwear with bleary eyes and wondering if you should buy the stiff empanadas in the bakery shelf at the convenience store even though you know damn well it will make you sick? If so, then you may have noticed this little device slapped on the pump somewhere. But it isn't just food and petroleum products they care about. They are extremely effective at scaring slumlords into compliance.

Each state has one so check it out for yourselves. These guys have a very simple website which is almost laughable if it wasn't so dead serious. Don't think they can't help you out. Drop them a line and see what they can do for you. Again, it costs nothing but some time and a bit of writing. (Yes, you'll have to write out the complaint in the little form). Takes about 2 weeks or so to get the results and you had better believe they are effective.

If you've tried and failed to get a resolution with the above agencies, then perhaps it's time to take it up a notch. Enter the notch topper: The AG.

The Attorney General, the name alone gets your attention. The AG, about as OG as any entity anywhere. They don't scare at all, can't be ignored and have the government pocketbook behind them, which makes them the best choice for consumers anywhere. Now, while the Bar Association can suggest particular attorney's, these people are something else. Aside from their regular duties of running the legal cabinet for the State of Florida (read; Chief Legal Officer of State & Head of Dept. of Legal Affairs) they also protect consumers against fraud, deceptive advertising/marketing, scams and general mayhem. Not to be confused with The United States Attorney General, which is the head lawyer (read: big cheese, top dog, head honcho) of the U.S. Dept of Justice, The State Attorney General is the head attorney for each state in the union. Magna cum laude? You bet your argyle socks they are. These people take fraud and scam operators very, VERY serious. Again, also free to consumers and they have a very impressive website with very impressive sections full of extremely serious looking people who you know damn well don't take shit from anyone. Mrs. Ashley Moody is the AG of Florida and she's a Republican to boot, which just makes her that much more effective. (let's not start a political debate, they don't care who you voted for, they'll help you out regardless). This is the place to go when the CFPB, FTC or Dept. of Agriculture can't mediate a particularly tough problem or don't apply to your particular situation. Drop in and have a read then go from there. Don't ever believe that because you don't know the laws and can't afford to pay, that help is denied you. That is NOT the case. these people care and they live for it.

Our clients say some pretty strange things...

Ever get the call with the guy screaming obscenities? No? Well, we have, and it wasn't us doing the screaming, I assure you. Consumers are taken advantage of its a fact. But filing a complaint is as American as apple pie, thanksgiving and any other cultural norm we co-opted and took as our own. Whatever, look, filing a complaint is the only way to keep companies honest. Reviews aside (and the star system Amazon uses which is nifty) a complaint won't earn you a star, but it will make a point where you believe you should have one made. you can go on the record about something or someone and it can help the next person from making the same mistake. The agencies here are consumer agencies which means what they do, day in and day out, affects the lives of every person in a state and every state in our union. This is America dammit and we Americans have rights.

I usually hear the complaints but when I ask if they know their rights, I hear silence as an answer. This is not the way it should be. People need to shake apathy loose and learn their rights. These above noted agencies don't care if you voted Republican or Democrat or Independent or even Socialist. They don't care if you wear pink socks or dye your hair blue. If you are a citizen, resident, resident alien or even an illegal alien, it does not matter. You are in this country, and you have rights. Learn your rights and go from there. We can help guide you, but nothing helps quite as well as these organizations which are chartered and empowered to serve the public trust. Think about it. if it wasn't for us consumers, all these lawyers would be stuck at the office playing gin rummy or pinochle or some other boring form of card games. These agencies live and breathe to serve consumer needs. So next time someone takes advantage of you or takes your money and won't give it back, or won't come fix the damned central ac unit like you asked for 6 months ago and its summer and the whole place is broiling, and they say they "can't find your paperwork", well drop these people a call and see what happens.

We support the Fly Over State Movement

The ‘flyover states’, as in, “Those idiots in the ‘flyover states.” It’s a derogatory term coined by arrogant politicians, news anchors and entertainment “personalities” who control the national airwaves. 

“FOS” is the response to these “thought leaders” and “influencers” who attempt to shame, silence and coerce our dignified, well-run families, our proud neighborhoods, cities, farming and ranching communities and states.

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