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social media ad, series 32

George Washington... general, President, marijuana farmer... patriot and badass in his own right, continues our historic collection push ad series extolling the virtues of moral duty and its counterpart, happiness. We believe it, brother. Our site is a monument to no bullshit in commerce. Duh.

Credit Repair advocacy is what we mainly do.

What that means to our visitors is we provide the unadulterated links and resources for them to know their rights, file complaints if they've been wronged and research the other nonprofits out there which can and may serve their specific needs over and above what we can do. What it means to our competitors is that they may have to start lighting novenas or finally complying with the law as it is written and not as they would have it interpreted. The law is pretty clear as to what is and what is not allowable, what is and what is not considered fair. Consumers may be confused with so much bullshit out there (I get migraines from laughing when I go out there to see what's going on), so this website exists to try to alleviate this problem.

It employs satire and upfront language to make a point and educate, it slaps the apathy away from what has become an all too common problem; mendacity.  We aren't lawyers, we are a group of pissed off Americans who decided to tilt the field in favor of the consumer. We provide services if the situation warrants it and if an individual so chooses. What we mainly do is what you see here: piss off collection agencies and our competitors.

Credit repair is a legitimate industry, but it has gone off the rails a while ago, and despite countless federal investigation and legal proceedings, people still fall prey to scams and other unethical operators. The Attorney general has guidelines to protect consumers (we link to the Florida AG website) and other governmental entities like the CFPB and FTC are there to do the same. Here is a little sampling of those things to watch out for.

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Credit repair do's and don'ts:

The little laws some competitors leave out

Companies must comply with the law as it is written. What this means is that if someone seeks out the assistance of a company (or individual) they are doing so under the impression (belief) that the person knows more than they do. To comply with the law, companies and individuals must be CLEAR about what the law says. The law they need to outline, provide information in booklet form to or direct link for, is the Fair Credit Reporting Act (FCRA). The law which in its broadness protects consumers, informs them of their rights in full, remedies against unethical operators and so on. This law is usually trimmed down to about three sentences by many companies. The law is not 3 sentences long. The part that is commonly used stipulates that "consumers have the right to challenge information in their credit reports if that information is erroneous, outdated, fraudulent, the result of error or illegal". The law actually covers a bunch of other things. Now while it may be argued that perhaps these operators didn't have the full and complete law, we are doing them a favor by listing them here.


Fair Credit Reporting Act


Now that we got that taken care of, lets move on. Another big thing missing from many competitors is the tiny little part where consumers have the right to SUE to recover damages if the actions of a Credit repair entity wronged them, damaged their files, etc. I wonder how that part could have been left out. I'm sure it wasn't intentional. Nevertheless, for arguments sake, here it is.


Consumers right to file suit against unethical operators.


Alright, now. Another little tidbit is left out of the loop. Call me a stickler for details, but this one is really important. Consumers actually can file complaints against anyone who under the guise or "expertise" royally screws their information up. Now lawsuits aside, which are feared because they can impose monetary penalties and deep six unethical operators, complaints aren't filed with some credit repair association crap that isn't going to anything about it, they are filed directly with federal ones. And this is also FREE. (My favorite words are free and all you can eat). So you see, these governmental bodies make it their life's work to look into those pesky companies or people who take your money and don't do jack to help you out. They find such complaints intriguing, the way a shark will find a bloody animal thrashing in the water intriguing. In case its been overlooked by competitors, here we went ahead and included them.


Consumer Finance Protection Bureau (CFPB)

Federal Trade Commission (FTC)

Attorney General, office of Pamela Bondi (FL.AG)

What our customers are saying

...you guys did what no one else could do. And I like that I can see it fast, not the letters and weeks and the slow work for more money.

Felipe Vargas, South Miami, FL. - Client & bad ass-chef since 2018

social media ad, series

Desperate measures?

We got your back dude. Check out the website, learn your rights, laugh at some goofy "ads" and don't let anyone take your wallet hostage.

Deceptive Wording:

Is this guy a lawyer or a lawyers neighbor??!

Deceptive wording is everywhere. But the law stipulates that if you say something then you must do the exact thing. You cant go to a McDonald's and ask for a quarter pounder and get a quarter ouncer! What is that shit??! Advertising has laws attached to protect consumers, so to does this service industry. Only here the penalty for noncompliance can include prison sentences and a cellmate named Trent who went overboard in security fraud (federal offenses remember?) Anyway, deceptive wording is more than saying something which can be lost to translation, it is willfully writing something to make it appealing to those who are not educated on the subject. Hence the example: "we remove negative debt" would be deceptive wording, because no such thing can be achieved LEGALLY.

The correct way to word something would be: "we remove inaccurately reported items only". By just wording it as "negative" it is termed deceptive, because negative information may be accurate, in which case you can't dispute it. But if it is legitimately erroneous, then it can be disputed.


Illegal advertising and wording happens every day, often by error, its just funny how it seems to happen in this industry nearly everywhere and no one spots the "error". You got people deliberately trying to pass themselves off as attorneys, and then you got some that don't even know how to spell attorney. You have guys searching for ways to make words sound fancy, or corporate or other bullshit. In my experience most lawyers have difficulty with grammar, but no difficulty with LAW. So there you go. Wording is a big deal, a really big deal. so big in fact, that federal regulators take keen notice of companies and individuals that use words to describe services in a positive light which may not necessarily be an accurate light. When in doubt, look around. I never went in for the euphemistic language shit. I never had to. but some people live their lives like that and think it makes them sound worldly. It doesn't. And in commerce it's a big no-no punishable by having federal regulators stop in to say "hello".

Remember, strippers can boast fake asses, but fake asses can't boast untruths.

Limiting Disputes:

"The triple-diamond, ultra platinum, executive package"

Who hasn't seen the whole "package" thing. It's an old marketing gimmick that works under the premise that you pay more for more complete service. Its not anything new, but you'd never know it from words like: Standard, Executive, Professional, Silver, Gold, Platinum! First of all, packages are just a way to drive sales. We have them too, but we don't drive sales with them. Our pricing is uniformed to the person not to the service. The service is the same for everyone. It is only different where ability to pay is a factor (pro-bono), disability or retired (low/fixed income), military or veteran (military/vet) or the regular individual who is not disabled or active military/vet. This is simplicity. Platinum and gold, and silver and diamond and executive is bullshit. It is the company or individual setting a limit on what is done and for how much. Costs are uniformed in this industry, because costs are REGULATED. What costs? the costs of doing business in the first place. Electricity, hardware, software, etc. All businesses run their equipment with electricity, buy machines to print and process data, coffee to keep the wandering mind focused, etc. these costs are uniformed more or less, so someone telling you that by charging you $300 upfront and $150 monthly will get you the best possible service is full of shit, unless it also includes a maid that will come clean your house or wax your car in a thong. the service is the same, the person is just setting the value of their work. And I cant argue with value. We each set the value of our work. I value my work based on merit not monetary value, if I did that I'd charge a million bucks and a donkey show.

Unfair Competition:

Slamming one guy to close deals!

Anyone can be a victim of this shit right here, and we are no different. Things to know are: anyone who threatens the status quo, can themselves be seen as a threat. Enter the unfair business tactics. This company is no different in this arena than many across the U.S. We've been attacked via email, threatened via telephone calls, have had false reports sent to our merchant bank (the dipshits actually threatened by text message from a corporate number before doing it), have had the pissed off unethical operators leave negative reviews on Google, on and on, and we are still here. The act itself is a federal offense.


Still in the business world, instead of staying sharp and competitive, many feel that bashing a competitor is a great way to draw in clients. We've seen it all. People saying they "went with everyone" or that they "went with so and so" and then plugging themselves as the solution. This is unfair competition, because it is deceptive competition. Almost as bad as wording something deceptively and as bad as limiting information. We bash all assholes who engage in deception equally, we make no special conditions for companies we "like". If you violate the law, we'll pull your pants down in public. However, we don't tell people to NOT go to these competitors, rather we actually want them to visit and see for themselves. that's the whole point of it. We don't care who anyone goes with, much like we don't mind what one considers fashionable. Just know your rights.


Anyway, unfair competition is investigated by the FTC and FBI and a bunch of agencies which are put in place by government oversight that find these types of complaints interesting. We report unfair business practices regularly to appropriate authorities and don't back down. Consumers have rights, and companies have to comply with these rights. But companies also have them and they have the same rights as consumers when reporting them.

What our customers are saying

The plain ass kickery is what has me hooked. The whole dorm gets in on it. Satire and knowledge. power to the people dudes!

Oriol Figueroa, Miami, FL. Visitor since 2017

Never trust an ad:

do your research, shop around

In this day and age, deception went digital. Reviews are good, word of mouth is great, but nothing trumps doing your own research. Visit the web, jump around, kick the virtual tires. See what's out there and educate yourself before you make a decision. Voltaire said once: "Common sense is not so common". Don't be the one he was talking about. Don't jump at an ad, don't jump at a review. Search up and do your homework. It is not just that your money is at play, but it is your data. Don't be one of the countless that jump at an ad then say "well, they had good ads!" You are responsible for your own destiny. The CFPB and the FTC can defend you but they don't guarantee that monies will be refunded by unethical operators. Save yourself the headache and look around. Visit review sites which ARE NOT PAID to host content. Do random Google searches for reviews and complaints, you'll be surprised what pops up.


Many companies spend hundreds of thousands of dollars a year to draw consumers to their pages, with the hopes of closing on sales and making money. Today's consumers are bombarded with advertising, claims and all sorts of digital spam. never trust spam. Do your own research. Do it!!

social media ad, series 10

Back to our roots! Ad, 2018 series.


Our roots are a bit different, we admit. But they are effective. Here we took a nice young lady with prodigious breasts, and well, yeah. Look, accuse of gratuitous sexuality, vulgarity, raunchy humor, running red lights, applying the 10 second rule to public movie theaters, whatever. But you can't say we are boring liars.

Only lawyers can give Legal Advise:

When in doubt, ask the Bar Association

The Bar Association is not a club for bar owners, it is the agency that upholds Legal Ethics in the profession. Yes, like doctors, lawyers are regulated big time. And many lawyers own collection agencies, and many more own credit repair or credit rehabilitation services. But only a lawyer can advertise legal services. If you are not a lawyer you can't even allude to it. This is a big problem, especially where legal agreements (contracts and such) are used frequently to conduct safe business as mandated by the CROA. Lot's of people figure that if lawyers phrase things in a certain light, then they can as well. But this is mistaken thinking.


When I first began to push this website out there, I ran into a problem in an online community room on social media. I saw people contributing to a room and I decided to do the same. I never once placed my information out there, but I dove right in and started advising people of their rights under the FCRA. Bam, I was booted from the room, banned for of all things spam!

So, I apologized, mentioned I never spammed anyone and then came the lurid: the guy who had requested me on messenger began to pick a fight with me. I explained I had not spammed and then he went sideways and asked if I was a lawyer. I said no, of course not. And then he did it, he alluded that they were a law firm, and that they would look into me and my "claims" and investigate me. naturally, I said alright.

Now this person was intimating that they had law offices in Florida. So, I called the Florida Bar. No such lawyer. I did a state wide search, no such lawyer. Now I was pissed. Getting a random threat from a lawyer is one thing, getting a random threat from a guy pretending to be a lawyer, that's another.

I traced the guy to a state nearly on the Canadian border. I found him, and he is not a lawyer, he works for a credit repair outfit out in the boonies! But, he does work for a lawyer that owns it. They don't have local offices. They can't make threats. Long story short, I put a formal complaint on record for this wanna be with the federal oversights.


Let it be a lesson, many people will claim many things, truth is often a lot different. Never trust an ad alone to make a decision, and if someone identifies as a lawyer or gives legal advise, ask for their credentials before you go further. lawyers must identify themselves as lawyers. This is what they do, its what the law demands. know your rights.


Dept. of State & Google:

How to search for company & corporate officers

One doesn't need to hire a Private Investigator or pay for the powerful software provided by Lexus Nexus, to investigate a company or corporate officers. All you need is a little know how. Information is free and everywhere, knowing how to reach it doesn't require much, just a little time. The world being what it is, some people will always seek to hide. In the corporate world, this can't be completely achieved because state agencies require transparency.


When you want to find a company, all you have to do is search the corporate records of your state. In Florida, these records are held at Sunbiz.org.

Say the company name is X Inc. you would go to Sunbiz and search under Corporate Name for X Inc. If nothing comes back, search under fictitious name. One way or the other the lists will come up. Click to view the documents and read them in PDF format. The Registered Agent (the person authorized to receive correspondence and legal papers) is listed there. Corporate officers are also listed (They can often be the same as Registered agent).

Say you find the company but it reads INACTIVE, this means the company is not registered with the state as a corporation. Under reasons for dissolution you can see why this is so. What this means is that the company is defunct, and if it is conducting business it is doing so not as an ACTIVE corporation.

Take the name of the corporate officers and place them inside Google search engine and do both a Web search and an Image search, see what comes up.


Double check the name against random google searches. If you can't find a company either by its trade name or its fictitious name, then you can do a wide search, placing something like: "president X Inc." in the search bar.

There are dozens of sites out there from white pages to corporate information sites, Facebook, Twitter, etc., which will search records and come up with a list of names.


I am providing this here because transparency in commerce is a big thing to us as a company. Lots of companies conduct commerce hidden behind facades of professionalism but don't list a single corporate officer. That is total bullshit. The public trust must be maintained always, at all costs.

A company can not maintain secret the information which is of interest to the public, especially if that entity claims to represent the public trust, or to conduct business dealing with the sensitive information of private citizens.

Automatic Billing:

Consider what you are doing before you do it!

Credit repair outfits from Utah to New York, Jersey to Florida often ask for credit card information for billing purposes. While this can be a legitimate thing, it does allow for a certain leeway on the part of the company that has your card. I'm not saying they'll go crazy and pay for advertising (a Florida company I am aware of tried to do this at a radio station that shall go unmentioned) or that they'll rent cars and hotel rooms with it. But a company having your billing information can an usually does bill for work not completed, especially when the client wishes to cancel. We don't ask anyone for their card information, but then we don't do half the shit our competitors do anyway. We are an old school enterprise, that charges when clients have confirmation of filing and then, we bill by invoice.


Billing by invoice is the way it SHOULD be done, but not the way things are done. nevertheless, these competitors will ask you for a card, and lock it into their merchant bank. Don't expect these banks to be well known banks. They are usually overseas banks, banks which operate inside the U.S. via web portals but which do not come under the oversight of the FDIC. These merchant banks aren't illegal per se, and having services tied to them is not a violation of the law, but it does come with banks willing to take a brunt chargeback, to deal with the headaches of clients complaining that they were charged for work not performed, etc. The banks don't do this altruistically. These offshore banks charge a goodly portion either upfront (from every transaction) plus a percentage point of the transaction. This would be over what any other merchant bank within the U.S. would charge, because U.S. banks have to comply with transparency, and these merchant banks don't really have to, not if they are chartered in St. Kitts and routing their transactions through a myriad system of servers in Europe or other countries.


Merchant banks are important to most companies, because for a fee (a fee higher than what a U.S. merchant will require) they can capture monies and deposit them precisely wherever they are directed to do so. What this means to a client who hands their banking information to a company that uses offshore merchant banking, is this: your information is leaving the U.S., being processed offshore and zipping across the globe to be deposited in a U.S. account (we hope) of the person who owns the company. Is this legal? Yes, it is. Do you have rights to protest? Usually yes, depending on the contract you signed when you signed up. The point isn't not to do it, but to know what you are doing before you do it.


I have received numerous complaints about U.S. based credit repair companies issuing a charge for a month ahead, even when the client asked to cancel a month prior. They can do it because the company has access to the card which is tied to a bank account.

We personally avoid this headache and keep our banking inside the U.S., by American companies and do so in compliance to the law and transparency in business.

If you find yourself in a situation where a credit repair charged you after you canceled and your bank tells you they can't do anything about it, visit the CFPB website and file a complaint against the company in question. It may get you the money back, since anyone with half a brain doesn't want a problem with the federal government, which is exactly who the CFPB get their oversight and mandated power from.

Marketing Gimmicks:

Act now! Supplies are running out!

Who the hell hasn't seen one of these annoying commercials? Using trigger wording like: "Act now!", "Limited time!" "Supplies are running out!". This is not the crème de la crème of bullshit claims, but it certainly is close. This is sensational wording or impact wording. Impact wording is used to trigger a response and create a sense of urgency in the consumer. As a development expert, I always avoided this wording as it is the mark of a rank amateur, but nevertheless it does have some impact and does work on some people. This would probably explain why it is still used today. Businesses employ various methods to sell their products or services, and nothing does it better than creating a sense of urgency in the consumer. Car manufacturers and beer breweries use hot women to make you believe that a hot girl, oiled up in a bikini, really finds a fat guy drinking in a bar, attractive. Car manufacturers hire Maddison avenue advertising companies to use wide open roads, speed and "chicks" in cut off jeans. Right beneath it, they tell you the truth in tiny micro text: Professional driver on closed course. The difference between the message and the disclaimer is obvious. One can't buy a mustang, pick up a half naked chick and break every road law on the planet, just for shit and giggles.


In advertising and marketing, businesses are always looking for the edge. in the "Professional" business world, companies try to outdo one another not only on service but on how that service is delivered upon. This is fine, because inside a capitalistic system, competition is built into the equation. In this industry, trigger wording, deceptive wording and sensational wording is as used as anywhere else.

Besides the audit and filing fees which we have covered, euphemistic language is used (often cleverly) to disguise one little thing: You can do things yourself or at the least, can have them done for you for little.

To my competitors I'm the figurative vampire. But not because I have bad taste, not because I use profanity, but rather because I say it like it is, in an industry that has a vested interest in saying things like it ain't. Truth, in a world of lies will always have a problem. nevertheless, someone has to do it, and who better than a thick skinned guy that doesn't have a problem calling people out on the bullshit? right, so deceptive wording is trigger wording, it is used to make a sale, it is used to hook someone in. Supplies are never running out! There is no limited time (unless you're in a strip club, dancers do intent on leaving at some point), There is no need to rush anything at all. These are outdated tactics. Built into the equation. But I suck at math, so I say fuck the equation. We don't need no stinking equations! This is how it is. make sure that when you see a company that words something like: "If you don't have the time, don't have the ability or just don't want to deal with the headache..."


EEEEEEEN wrong! that right there is deceptive wording. It reinforces to a consumer that the issue is difficult, that it is a headache, that it is confusing, etc. there is not one competitor that I've seen that doesn't pull something like this at some point.

Be on the lookout for deceptive wording, deceptive tactics and trigger keywords.

Remember, strippers telling you time is running out to get into a VIP room is true, companies telling you time is running out to pay the bargain basement pricing of only $499.99 for the best credit repair on the planet, is absolutely, fabulously and totally, bullshit.